An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman ran into a bar and say to the bartender, “Quick! We need somewhere to hide. There’s a man trying to kill us!” The bartender…

A woman is at home when she hears someone knocking at her door. She goes to the door, opens it and sees a man standing there. He asks the lady,…

A man in Scotland calls his son in London the day before Christmas Eve and says, “I hate to ruin your day but I have to tell you that your…

Three old men were sitting on a bench when a reporter approached them. “I wonder if you three would be willing to do an interview and tell me your secret…

Wanda’s dishwasher quit working so she called in a repairman. Since she had to go to work the next day, she told the repairman, “I’ll leave the key under the…

A man and his wife were traveling down the highway when they saw the lights of a patrol car behind them. When they pulled over, the patrol man came up…

A foursome of senior golfers hit the course with waning enthusiasm for the sport. “These hills are getting steeper as the years go by,” one complained. “These fairways seem to…

A drunkard with a ragged, dirty look came in to apply for the position. The director of the winery wondered how to send him away. He gave him a glass…

Mrs. Murphy and Mrs. Cohen had been longtime close friends. But being old-fashioned, each went to a retirement home of her own respective religion. It was not long before Mrs.…